Thursday, May 29, 2014

About yesterday

Wow. Yesterday's post sure hit a nerve in some folks. Who knew there were so many of "us". I heard from so many people who said the same thing, "it was if you were writing about me". Now what? What is the answer? Or is there one? Some theories that were discussed are that we are caretakers and those whom we take care of cannot see us in any other role. If we are weak or in need it throws them completely off balance. If we are in need who will take care of them? I suppose that has some merit. Another is that they are just too wrapped up in their own life's worries that they cannot take on another's, even as they ask us to take theirs on. They think we are strong enough to handle whatever comes our way. Or we just pick crappy friends. Maybe it is all of these. I had lots and lots of people tell me that I could call them at 3:00 am. That was very nice. However, I know I would not. Why you ask? Well because I know they have a lot on their plate and I would not want to add to it. Yet if they called me at 3:00 am I would be right there for them. How screwed up is that? Still being a caretaker! Why do we think higher of other's issues or problems than our own? I am sure that each and every one of us have problems that are worthy of needing help or a listening ear to get through it. Yet we seem to choose those who are the least likely to listen. Setting ourselves up for disappointment. I made it through my crisis. Perhaps not in the healthiest of ways, but I did survive it. It was such a comfort to just know there were others out there struggling. And making it through. We are a tough bunch, us caretakers. We have to be. I think we should form a club. So that when we are in need of a listener there would be someone to be there for us. No one would show up for the meetings. We would all be out there listening to someone and taking care of them. Feeling that we are not worthy of needing help. The Bloggess speaks of finding her tribe. I believe I found mine yesterday. We are a mixed bunch with many different issues. I think we are fabulous! We are a strong bunch because we have to be. I believe we can spot a fellow caretaker, we need to learn to ask for help from the right people. Perhaps just knowing there are others out there willing to be our caretakers will be enough to get us through our own crisis. You can always call me at 3:00 am. Come to the meeting. There will be cookies.

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