Thursday, May 8, 2014

Are You a Strong One?

My son's tell me that I never meet strangers. I have people talk to me about the most amazing things when I have only just met them. Standing in line at the grocery store or bank is an invitation for a mini psych session. People seem to be comfortable telling me things. Sometimes things I don't want to hear. *shudder* The images! The images! Anyway, there is a down side to this. As a strong person I am not allowed to be weak. Those around me don't expect it, and sometimes can't even handle it. I am the one people come to tell their problems. When I need to talk about mine, they are not available. Or maybe they are just not able to see me as the person who is needy. Here is a secret. I am sometimes. Quite needy. I get the strength from my mother. She was amazing. People told her things, too. People came to her for advice, understanding, to vent, whatever. And she was always there. For me, too. Now that she is gone, I feel her absence so much when I am needy. Sometimes I even pick up my phone to call her. Then it hits me, she won't answer. Ever. I want to be taken care of for a change. I want to be the one who is a mess and someone else comes to pick up the pieces. I want to be the one who is not expected to be strong. Unfortunately I don't see that happening. I wonder now, if this is something Momma had to deal with. I saw her weak. I saw her cry. I am so fortunate to know that side of her. I got to hold her and console her. Very few people had that privilege. Like her I will get up tomorrow and be strong again. I will shake it off. I would recommend that all of us who are the strong ones start a club. No one would ever be able to come to the meetings. There is always someone who needs us. Look around and be aware of the strong ones around. Ask them if they are all right. We may say "I'm fine", but just maybe we may show you our weak side. You can be the strong one. Who knows you may like it. Or not. It's OK. There are enough of us to go around. We got this. It's who we are.

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